Lessons Learned

Today I was asked to submit a personal safety plan. I was told by my managers to read other people’s plans and cut and paste what was appropriate for me. As I was a bit bored, cough, enthusiastic, I went one step further by changing some wording and adding a couple of original ideas. My manager (M) reviewed it and popped it right back with a couple of suggestions.

1. Please list specific safety training courses you will be attending this year.

-Ok, I can do that, no problem. I can even say that this is a good suggestion.

2. Given what H does (some non-office based natural resources field work), please talk about steps you can take to influence his safe behaviors through your “new learnings” at work.

-Well, sorry, but you haven’t taught me anything new. I am well aware that I should hold the banister when ascending and descending steps and close my desk drawers when I am not looking for something in them. Moreover H undergoes his own rigorous safety training which is actually appropriate to the nature of his work. I’m sorry but I don’t consider paper cuts, dead light bulbs, open drawers, computer wires, and stairs to be worth one full week of training. Additionally, every time someone hurts themself I don’t need M to tell me the safety “learnings”. I already know not to trip over curbs (because someone was high), fall down stairs (drunk), or put my fingers into operating equipment (stupid). In other words, as H was told on his first day of work, “don’t put your finger anywhere you wouldn’t put your pecker.”

But since I am a good employee, I decided to humor M and add a few more points to my Safety Plan taken from some things H has learned in his work in more “challenging” parts of the world:

• Engage in regular conversations with H about best practices for safety at work and home
• Registering with the local embassy and learning its emergency contact numbers
• Registering for State Department Travel Advisories for regions we are living or travelling in
• Checking State Department Travel Advisories before embarking on a trip
• Maintaining appropriate levels of K&R insurance
• Memorizing country evacuation plans in case of emergency
• Maintaining an appropriate level of cash on hand for facilitating entries/exits to countries in case of emergency

Best and Regards,
Anonymous Expat

The best part? M LOVED it. Although he didn’t what K&R Insurance actually is. You learn something everyday! Don’t know? Google it. Or go to a country like Nigeria, Yemen, Iraq and Columbia and wish you had it.