There Are Some Things In Life That I'll Never Understand

One of our neighbors who owns a car like this:

decided that they needed to take the valve caps off the tires of our decidedly less flash car for their own use.  I’m thinking that whoever took our valve caps is either a kleptomaniac or really lazy.  Given that we live down the street from a tire shop, I’m thinking it’s the former.  

If H didn’t check the tire pressure so frequently, I’d be tempted to rub some poison ivy over the next set of valve caps as a present to the neighbour who decides to borrow them.  Instead I guess that I’ll have to resort to either vacuuming or playing loud music very early in the morning, cooking unpleasantly pungent food to perfume the hallways, spreading my junk mail between the neighbors' mailboxes, or getting a guard dog to deter the resident kleptomaniac from actually entering our home (excrement outside neighbors doors and repeated barking would be a side bonus). 

Just kidding, I have neither the time nor the inclination to do any of the above.  Well, I may already distribute my unaddressed junk mail between my neighbors boxes when I don’t feel like taking it to a trash can.  While the Australia Post is terrible at delivering mail that’s actually addressed to us, they do an excellent job of filling our mailbox with Domino’s menus, real estate ads, and mail from about two dozen former residents.   Hey, I’m just trying to share the love.  Who wouldn’t want a special discount on one of Domino’s Biggest Losers’ pizzas?

I'm Sorry, I Thought It Was Raining

Today I went to a full day of company mandated driving school to learn safe driving for off road environments.  Did someone say doughnuts, oversteering, understeering and emergency braking instead of excel?  Yes please!  The morning was great despite sharing a sedan with four fairly large men.  After lunch (and by lunch I mean averting my eyes while all the guys ate cold meat pies off the lunch truck), we left the training center for some off road driving. 

I took over driving the white land cruiser (sans flames, after all it is Australia, not Qatar) in a parking lot about twenty minutes from the city.  My first task was to indicate while pulling out of the parking spot.  I buckled my seat belt, adjusted the mirrors, started the engine, put the car in drive, reached my hand up to turn the blinkers on, and promptly started the windshield wipers.  Oh yes, I totally forgot that non-European cars in Australia have the windshield wipers and blinkers on reverse sides of the steering wheel.

I apologized to the instructor, explaining that in case he couldn’t tell from my accent, I’m American and used to the blinkers being on the left side of the steering wheel.  Furthermore I explained, my car in Australia is European and has the blinkers on the left side of the steering wheel.  I then apologized to the rear of the car, explaining how not only am I relatively new at driving on the opposite side of the road (left turn into near lane, right turn into far lane), I also have never driven such a large car.  Let’s just say that they all double checked that their seatbelts were securely fastened.

Luckily, it was all uphill from there and the instructor told me that I passed with flying colors, even not taking into account that I’m a newbie at driving on the opposite side of the road.  Now if only M would let me order a frame so I can display my shiny new certificate on my office wall…clearly a DTEC 6 Certificate belongs alongside my diploma.

And WA Makes Three

Today I went to get my WA driver’s license. Having a U.S. license, I did not need to take a written or road exam, but just needed to provide my U.S. license, passport, and proof of address ( a piece of mail) at the local licensing center. I figured that the process here would be much easier than getting my driver’s license in Doha where I needed:

1. My U.S. license approved by the police chief, aka the man in the most flowing white robes in the police station, who did not speak English or care to look at me.
2. A letter of permission from my husband, translated into Arabic. This was available outside the main licensing area, still within the police compound, in a shed resembling an outhouse for ~$1.50.
3. My Qatar Residency ID, H’s Qatar Residency ID and photocopies of both. This was also available outside in the “outhouse” for ~$1.50 except during tea breaks, bathroom breaks, and calls to prayer.
4. Two passport pictures, on a blue background. One was immediately thrown away and the other was stapled to my application and then thrown away filed. Where did my driver’s license picture come from? A download from the government website (of the same photograph).
5. An eye test which I found my way to past a bathroom, up some stairs, past another counter where you could take a number from (did I need to stop and do that?), and into the first room with a door open and an employee in it. Luckily I had been told that sometimes the examiner showed really small letters for the test but you could ask (joking tone required) for larger letters, telling the examiner that it had “been a long day.” Mission successful! Fortunately it worked, or I may not have passed.

So with all of this documentation and a wait of approximately three hours in a very crowded room with all men, I got my Qatari driver’s license with its beautiful background picture of the Emir on his horse. Very apt!

In Perth, after a very short wait, I was called to a counter and asked to present all of my documentation. The relevant documents where photocopied and examined and then I got a very polite, “pardon me for a moment,” and the woman helping me left the counter to find what looked like the manager of the licensing center. They went back and forth with a lot of headshaking while I waited wondering if they thought my license was a fake or invalid for some reason. The woman came back with a grim face and asked me if I am only licensed to drive an automatic vehicle because my license reads “Auto Driver License.” I explained that no, it likely meant automobile and my license is indeed valid for all passenger non-commercial vehicles. She accepted the explanation and I am now the proud owner of a WA license. Fortunately there is no local law requiring one to be able to drive a manual vehicle in order to receive a WA license, because that is something that I have yet to learn. And apparently for work I need to take a defensive driving course, in a SUV with a manual transmission. This should be interesting!