An acquaintance of mine had some trouble with the law recently. And like most things in Australia, it was a minor situation that somehow ended up with a petty and ridiculous conclusion. Through this incident we have learned that in small town Australia, it is worth stopping someone who is walking home on a quiet street if they are walking in the middle of the street as opposed to on the side of it or on a sidewalk. After the police officer stepped out of his car on the quiet street, our Anonymous Friend sized him up and found the local law enforcement officer to be on the larger side of portly. Quickly deciding that he didn’t really want to pay the A$50 fine for obstructing the non existent traffic flow on the street, he made a dash for it. He didn’t think the cop could get back to his car in about 20 seconds, at which point he would be around the corner and gone; without the car the cop would sooner suffer heart failure than catch him.
This plan worked brilliantly until a younger and far fitter police officer who was sitting unseen inside the car gave chase, with the car. Anonymous Friend made it to about a block away until he was overtaken by the police car. To add to the red face of the over sized police officer, when asked why he ran, our acquaintance told him that he looked like a “fat f**k” and was pretty sure he wouldn’t be able to catch up on foot. Unamused, the police officer arrested him and made him a ward of the state until he could post bail.
Unfortunately this town is so small that Anonymous Friend couldn’t find adequate legal representation and had to fly in a lawyer for his court date. Fortunately the judge had a sense of humor, and while he did not condone avoiding law enforcement, understood that there was little danger to public safety, and only sentenced him to a slap on the wrist.
This did not sit well with previously mentioned over sized local law enforcement officer. He meted out his own punishment by passing around Anonymous Friend’s mug shot at bars to warn everybody about this “trouble maker” and vigorously enforcing jaywalking ordinances.
This plan worked brilliantly until a younger and far fitter police officer who was sitting unseen inside the car gave chase, with the car. Anonymous Friend made it to about a block away until he was overtaken by the police car. To add to the red face of the over sized police officer, when asked why he ran, our acquaintance told him that he looked like a “fat f**k” and was pretty sure he wouldn’t be able to catch up on foot. Unamused, the police officer arrested him and made him a ward of the state until he could post bail.
Unfortunately this town is so small that Anonymous Friend couldn’t find adequate legal representation and had to fly in a lawyer for his court date. Fortunately the judge had a sense of humor, and while he did not condone avoiding law enforcement, understood that there was little danger to public safety, and only sentenced him to a slap on the wrist.
This did not sit well with previously mentioned over sized local law enforcement officer. He meted out his own punishment by passing around Anonymous Friend’s mug shot at bars to warn everybody about this “trouble maker” and vigorously enforcing jaywalking ordinances.
